I really adore the change in seasons.
Fall and spring are my absolute fave. There’s something about these “transition seasons” that always inspires me to nest, clean, and ground. Perhaps its the fact I know change, and most likely a harsh winter, are right around the corner.
These seasons also can be difficult to navigate. After all, change is at once exciting and wonderful, scary and stressful! Even in the most positive of changes, the stress monster lurks right around the corner, ready to sabotage your pleasure, relationships, and well-being. Kind of like the bear above- totally not who you want along for the ride!
Knowing this, its important to take steps to make these things a priority. A good question to ask is how can I navigate transitions without saying farewell to my sex drive and relationship? We need change to grow but how you handle it is totally up to you!
Determined not to let stress kill your sex drive? Check out this list of things to avoid, inspired by the wonderful Allison Braun. Each item on the list might look appealing when stress comes a-knocking, but in reality they hold nothing but empty promises. Psst…. these are really good things to practice saying no to!
Just say no to these sex-drive killers:
Granny panties. Slipping into something sexy on an otherwise ordinary day is an easy and discreet way to boost your mood, confidence, and all-around good feeling. Toss out any undies that are stained, don’t fit, or are just plain ugly. Replace them with lace, silk, satin, soft cotton, fun colors, flattering cuts, and cute designs. Don’t forget some sexy black ones so not even your monthly visitor can hamper your sexy!
Your inner mean girl. We all have one…and quite frankly she’s cranky and just plain wrong. If her voice pops up, telling you you aren’t pretty/smart/sexy/etc “enough,” tell her to shut it and then put her in timeout. This may be wicked hard to do if you’re used to listening to everything she has to say. With practice, patience, and taking it moment by moment it gets easy to spot her BS and get back to your pleasure!
Skipping your workout. I know – working out can suck, especially if you can’t do something you love. But it does make you feel damn good, especially when you master something new. Plus, endorphins help you feel happy and sweat is full of attention-grabbing pheromones.
That fifth glass of wine. A little bit of alcohol turns you into a sex goddess. Too much can cause vaginal dryness, inability to orgasm, passing out, getting sick, and all other sorts of un-sexy things. So grab some seltzer with lime and get ready to rock someone’s world. Public Health PSA: Skipping those extra glasses of wine is also good for your girls as there’s a pretty clear connection between alcohol intake and breast cancer.
Skipping sleep to watch just. one. more. episode. of Downton/the Bachelor/the Carrie Diaries/Grey’s/Mindy Project/whatever you fancy.Let’s just say they don’t call it beauty sleep for nothing. <–but really, can we call it sexy sleep? I mean glowing skin + lots of energy + muscle repair + hormone balancing…I’d say sleep exists to make morning sex great.
Complaining…over and over again. It drains your energy, sends out negative vibes like WHOA, and rubs off on the people around you. Think about the last time you chatted with someone who complained the whole time. I’m betting by the end, you were feeling pretty crappy too. I’m not saying to stop complaining all together…just limit it. The more you talk about whatever is bothering you, the more you give it life and energy and allow it to call the shots. Take control of your complaining, your pleasure, and your life.
If you’ve said ‘yes’ to any of these, you are not alone. They all look so appealing and each offers something that, at first glance, seems like it’ll make change easier to bear. Ultimately though, its your pleasure and relationships that suffer. So take it moment-by-moment and join me in saying “oh heeeeeeck no!”
In the comments, tell me which one of these will be hardest for you to resist.