Everything You Need to Know about your Cervix, from Cervical Orgasms to Cervical Cancer

person in white underwear from waist to upper thighs holding a red rose in a menstrual cup

Did you know that January is Cervical Health Month? This hidden part of your anatomy plays a huge role in your sexual and reproductive health! But unless you’ve struggled to get pregnant, tracked your cycle via certain forms of natural family planning, or had an issue, you probably haven’t spent much time thinking about your cervix.

So this week we’re going deep! Both into your body (bow chicka bow wow) and the topic. Think of this post as part love letter and part tell-all exposè. From the basics (what the cervix is and why it’s important) to health (taking care of your cervix & cervical cancer facts) to pleasure (cervical orgasms anyone?), this post has everything you need to know about this vital but oft ignored part of your tingy bits.

What and where is my cervix?

Your cervix is the lowest part of your uterus, where it connects with your vagina. It’s located 3-6 inches inside your vagina, and is shaped like a small donut with a tiny hole in the center. 

Need a visual? The Beautiful Cervix Project has amazing photo galleries. Each one showcases a series of photos of different women’s cervices. There aren’t external genitalia visible in any of the photos but view at your discretion.

Your cervix changes positions throughout your menstrual cycle. This also happens when you get turned on. As you get aroused, your cervix pulls up and back in a process called “vaginal tenting” (my absolute favorite sex geek word) to create more space inside your vagina for fun things like fingers, penises, and sex toys.

Cervix| All About the Cervix: Cervical Health, Cervical Orgasm, Cervical Cancer 2 | Passion by Kait
This is loosely anatomically correct…

Can I feel my cervix?

Yup! To find it, insert your longest finger into your vagina.When your finger can’t reach further, you found your cervix. It may feel soft, like pursed lips, or firm, like the tip of your nose, depending on where you are in your cycle.

You can also stimulate your cervix during sex. If you ever felt a unique, maybe painful, sensation in your lower belly during intercourse, that’s your cervix. This can feel amazing for some people – yes even if it’s hurt in the past! – so scroll down for tips on having a cervical orgasm!

What does my cervix do/why should I care about it?

The cervix secretes the discharge that you see (and potentially lament if it ruins your favorite undies…just me?) throughout your menstrual cycle. Sex geek fact: the change in consistency of this cervical mucus promotes or prevents pregnancy depending on where you are in your cycle. Isn’t the body so damn cool?!

The cervix also is why I describe the vagina as a “giant U-turn” when I teach workshops. It lets discharge, period blood, and babies out, but doesn’t let anything (eg condoms, kegels/ben wa balls, etc) go in. Think of your it like your body’s bouncer: it stops whatever enters your vagina from making its way further in!

Do I need to take care of my cervix? How?

Yes! Here’s 4 ways to love on this small but mighty part of your tingly bits.

    1. Look in your panties. Your discharge changes a lot throughout your cycle. Get to know what’s normal for you when. Look at it, touch it, smell it – whatever you’re comfortable with! This’ll help you know sooner rather than later if something changes. This article from Refinery 29 does an amazing job of showing you what’s normal & what to look out for.
    1. Find a healthcare provider you feel comfortable talking to about your sexual health, including cervical cancer prevention. This can be a gynecologist or primary care provider, doctor or nurse practitioner (I have the best NP in NYC if you need a recommendation). If you don’t have insurance or going to someone in-network isn’t an option for any reason, consider Planned Parenthood or similar clinics (click here for a state-by-state listing).
    1. Visit your provider regularly. Visit your healthcare provider at least once a year for a “Well Woman Visit.” Go sooner if you have any issues including painful sex, unusual discharge (see #4 below), changes in your period, abdominal pain, etc.
    1. Get the right cervical cancer screening. Yup – I’m talking about Pap smears. Now listen, I know they’re unpleasant! That’s why I encourage you to find a healthcare provider you know and trust. Putting yourself in an awkward, uncomfortable, and unpleasant situation is easier if you’re with someone you like. This goes for basically everything in life! I’ve had amazing gynos and awful ones – and the difference in both my anxiety and the discomfort during the Pap is fricking massive.
      *steps off soapbox*
      Now here are the most updated cervical cancer screening guidelines. Note: If you have a family history of cervical cancer or have had abnormal test results, these guidelines may be different.

        • You should get your first Pap smear at age 21, regardless of if or when you started having sex.
        • If you’re 20-29, you’ll get a Pap every 3 years. Note: if you change health insurance plans during this time, your new plan may require another one. 
        • If you’re 30 and over, you’ll either get a Pap every 3 years OR a Pap with an HPV test every 5 years.
      • If you’re 65 and over or post-hysterectomy, you most likely won’t need any more Pap smears unless you have a history of abnormal test results.
  1. Get your HPV vaccine. A handful of the 100+ types of HPV(human papillomavirus) cause most cervical cancers. Preventing these strains is the single most powerful way to take care of your cervix and prevent cervical cancer.

What’s the real deal on HPV & cervical cancer?

I know cancer isn’t a sexy topic but it’s a reality. And if you live in the US, you’ve heard about HPV and cervical cancer in recent years. The HPV vaccine commercials even played on Hulu for a while!

I don’t share this info to scare you, but to empower you to take ownership over your body as much as possible. As someone with multiple chronic illnesses, I know how tempting it is to bury your head in the sand – the pain and fear and overwhelm and paperwork and costs and… !!!! This info here for you when you’re ready. And if anything in my recommendations above feel scary or overwhelming, I hope that this section motivates you to move through that and take better care of your down there (and yes it’s ok to call it that to a professional – we don’t care we just want you to talk about it!).

So what’s the deal? About 13,000 people in the US get diagnosed with cervical cancer each year. You’re more likely to be diagnosed if you have lower income, don’t have good healthcare access, or are between the age of 35-55.

The good news is that cervical cancer is preventable! The HPV vaccine all but stops it from developing. Regular screenings as outlined in #4 above, detect cancer early when it’s easier to treat.

Are cervical orgasms real? How do I have them?

Can people experience orgasm from cervical stimulation? You betcha! Not everyone, of course, and not in the same ways but it is possible.

For some people, cervical stimulation feels really good! However, as I mentioned above it can also feel unpleasant. Approach this with gentle curiosity and use these three tips to explore: 

    • Time it right. The location and sensitivity of your cervix changes throughout your cycle (yes even if you’re on birth control). Generally, it’s most sensitive in the days before and during your period so avoid stimulating it then. Instead, try when you ovulate – about 2 weeks before your period comes. Remember: these are just suggestions. If having your cervix touched feels iffy, try it during different times of months to see if anything changes.
    • Assume the (right) position. Because your cervix is 3-6 inches in your vagina, you’ll need deeper stimulation. Doggy style is a great option (here are 4 tips to make it hotter). Another great option is lap dance position. Have your partner sit on the edge of a couch or chair. Stand between their legs with your butt facing them, and then sit down on their penis. Roll your hips and bend forward slightly for deeper stimulation.
  • Be super duper turned on. Don’t go straight for deep penetration that reaches your cervix. Instead, get all the way turned on (here are some ideas to do that) first. Then go deeper. Make sure whatever you use – fingers, penis, or sex toy – touches the cervix with each thrust.

Keep the conversation going!

    1. Leave a comment below with any questions about the cervix, cervical health, etc.
  1. Share this post with the other cervix-havers in your life. I’m not exaggerating when I say it could change or save their life.

Your Partner in Passion,

Kait xo

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