“Now that I’m in a committed relationship with the man of my dreams, why isn’t the sex as good as when I was single? The marriage bed should be better than a truck-bed fling.”
I totally hear you! From a very young age, we’re sold the story that finding our One True Love will lead to a Happily Ever After. And while fairytales don’t often show that ‘after,’—and never show the sexy times—it’s implied that good sex is part of the HEA package.
That expectation can add tremendous pressure to a relationship, even if you enjoy an enduring sex life that’s as intimate, exciting, and fulfilling as you crave. And when it’s not? Like you, folx find themselves flabbergasted that the marriage bed isn’t better.
First of all, know that what you’re experiencing is totally normal and even expected. Everyone’s sex life—single, partnered, whatever!—goes through ups and downs, periods of excitement, and disappointment.
There are many different reasons one’s sex life in a committed relationship might not be better than casual sex. Read on for 10 reasons, with input from some experts.