10 Ways To Use Essential Oils for Sex

couple in shower kissing and touching sensually

In recent months, essential oils have become a huge part of my routine. I use them primarily to support my physical & mental health, and for self-care. When it comes to creating the intimate, exciting, & fulfilling sex life you crave, there’s an oil for that too! Here’s 10 ways to use essential oils for sex!

Using Essential Oils for Sex – the Basics

Most oils cannot be applied “neat” aka directly to your skin. You need to dilute them in a carrier oil (like coconut oil) if you apply them topically. Here are the dilution rates

Photo from http://go.rockymountainoils.com/SHqG

Alternatively, you can diffuse the oils.

You’ll see both methods mentioned below.

One last note: while some folks encourage using essential oils in & around the genitals (eg to create lube), I don’t. Oils can alter the vaginal & anal microbiomes and may not be condom-safe, especially when used with a carrier oil. Plus the skin down there is extremely absorbent and sensitive. Even something that doesn’t bother you elsewhere may cause a reaction. If you really want to try it, use a .5-1% dilution rate to start.

10 Ways to Use Essential Oils for Sex

To get in the mood

Ylang Ylang is a known aphrodisiac, making it a great essential oil for female arousal. Rub a little on your inner thighs and pulse points or diffuse it, and enjoy what comes next. Don’t love the Ylang Ylang’s sweet floral scent? Try Sandalwood (more woodsy) or Clary Sage (more herbal) instead.

Sexpert Tip: only use this when you want to have sex so it becomes your signature scent. Your beau will get the hint and know immediately when they smell this that it’s go time.

To feel more confident

You wanna be a confident + sexy siren and just go for it… but you’re nervous. Orange to the rescue! It lifts your mood, boosts your confidence, and diminishes your inner mean girl.

To stay in the moment

Are you easily distracted during sex? Struggle to stay in the moment? Keep thinking about your to-do list and the laundry and and and…?

It’s not you- it’s your brain (and society). Women have more white matter aka connective tissue in our brains. That’s why it seems like we can multitask so much better than most gents. The downside? Your mind also tends to wander during important things too, like sex!

One solution? Use essential oils for female stimulation. Diffuse Attention Assist (more woodsy) or Present Moments (more florally) to help you stay present & relish every sensation.

Read more: Not in the Mood? Have More Satisfying Sex with These 3 Steps

Set a romantic mood

Mix together your favorite citrus oil with your favorite aphrodisiac one. Diffuse to give yourselves that loving feeling.


For most people, stress is a major sex drive killer. Taking time to destress before getting intimate – whether that’s throughout your day or in the moment – is one of the most powerful steps you can take for more intimate, exciting, & fulfilling sex. I keep At Peace with me at all times so that no matter where I am, I can chill the eff out.

Read more: How to Deal with Stress in a Relationship: Unwind Together

To ditch your inner mean girl

Having one of those days where you absolutely are not #feelingmyself? This Love blend is perfect for those moments. It helps diminish negative self-talk while encouraging feelings of love, self-acceptance, & forgiveness. Put some in your bath, dot it on your pulse points, take some deep inhalations of it, or diffuse it.

To amp up your massage

Sensual massage is one of my favorite ways to transition from your day to sexytime. It gets you out of your head and into your body, and feels amazing. Add a few drops of Mind Alive to your favorite massage lotion or oil to promote feelings of confidence, relaxation, and connection.

To alleviate health symptoms

Most of what impacts your sex life has nothing to do with sex! If there’s a symptom like pain, tummy issues, or congestion messing with your sexy time, use oils to address them in the moment.

Read more: The Science-Backed Key to Better Sex

As someone with two chronic illnesses—Crohn’s Diseases & a form of arthritis called Ankylosing Spondylitis —pain + tummy troubles are common. I carry Tummy Rub and Pain Ease with me everywhere. The former I rub on my belly when I’m bloated, nauseous, or gassy; the latter I rub on the entire area that’s in pain.

To lift the mood

Sex is on your schedule (or you’re horny) but you kinda sorta aren’t feeling very loving towards your beau. Give Joyful Moments a try to balance the charged emotions & move forward (hopefully towards sexy time).

To wake the eff up

Need a burst of energy? Diffuse or apply Red Mandarin for a burst of energy + overall wellbeing. It’s also great to diffuse when you’re getting ready for a date.

Read more: 4 Easy Ways to Have Amazing Sex in the Morning

Bonus: try an arousal oil

Unlike regular essential oils, arousal oils are formulated to be applied to the genitals. You apply 1-3 drops to the clitoris and VOILA: instant-arousal.

Not only do they tingle and encourage blood flow to the clitoris, they also jumpstart lubrication, make it easier to experience orgasm, and make your orgasms stronger.

This one is our fave because it uses peppermint and sweet almond oils. Plus it comes in three different levels, so if you’re more or less sensitive you can adjust accordingly!

With the right essential oils, you can create a more intimate, exciting, & fulfilling sex life.

Like sex toys, oils aren’t a cure-all. They’re one tool of many! But they’re easy to use, lack the taboo associated with vibrators & other adult toys, and have endless uses in the bedroom and out.

Ready to take sex and intimacy to a whole new level with essential oils?

Our guide to Essentials oils for sex IS FOR YOU!

Find out how to use EOs to:

  • Boost your libido
  • Enjoy stronger orgasms
  • Feel more confident

…in the bedroom and out!

The PbK Guide to Essential Oils for Sex tells you EVERYTHING you need to know about using EOs to enhance sex, intimacy, and pleasure, including essential oil safety, the best essential oils for arousal, orgasm, and other sexy times, how to choose a carrier oil, and, of course, sexy recipes!  

0,Passion by Kait Guide to Essential Oils for Sex

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6 thoughts on “10 Ways To Use Essential Oils for Sex

    1. It depends on who you asked. I don’t recommend using oils on the genitals OR ingesting them. I recommend talking with a healthcare provider to rule out underlying conditions. Additionally, a penis ring can help.

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