In recent months, essential oils have become a huge part of my routine. I use them primarily to support my physical & mental health, and for self-care. When it comes to creating the intimate, exciting, & fulfilling sex life you crave, there’s an oil for that too! Here’s 10 ways to use essential oils for sex!
Using Essential Oils for Sex – the Basics
Most oils cannot be applied “neat” aka directly to your skin. You need to dilute them in a carrier oil (like coconut oil) if you apply them topically. Here are the dilution rates
Alternatively, you can diffuse the oils.
You’ll see both methods mentioned below.
One last note: while some folks encourage using essential oils in & around the genitals (eg to create lube), I don’t. Oils can alter the vaginal & anal microbiomes and may not be condom-safe, especially when used with a carrier oil. Plus the skin down there is extremely absorbent and sensitive. Even something that doesn’t bother you elsewhere may cause a reaction. If you really want to try it, use a .5-1% dilution rate to start.
10 Ways to Use Essential Oils for Sex
To get in the mood
Ylang Ylang is a known aphrodisiac, making it a great essential oil for female arousal. Rub a little on your inner thighs and pulse points or diffuse it, and enjoy what comes next. Don’t love the Ylang Ylang’s sweet floral scent? Try Sandalwood (more woodsy) or Clary Sage (more herbal) instead.
Sexpert Tip: only use this when you want to have sex so it becomes your signature scent. Your beau will get the hint and know immediately when they smell this that it’s go time.
To feel more confident
You wanna be a confident + sexy siren and just go for it… but you’re nervous. Orange to the rescue! It lifts your mood, boosts your confidence, and diminishes your inner mean girl.
To stay in the moment
Are you easily distracted during sex? Struggle to stay in the moment? Keep thinking about your to-do list and the laundry and and and…?
It’s not you- it’s your brain (and society). Women have more white matter aka connective tissue in our brains. That’s why it seems like we can multitask so much better than most gents. The downside? Your mind also tends to wander during important things too, like sex!
Set a romantic mood
For most people, stress is a major sex drive killer. Taking time to destress before getting intimate – whether that’s throughout your day or in the moment – is one of the most powerful steps you can take for more intimate, exciting, & fulfilling sex. I keep At Peace with me at all times so that no matter where I am, I can chill the eff out.
To ditch your inner mean girl
Having one of those days where you absolutely are not #feelingmyself? This Love blend is perfect for those moments. It helps diminish negative self-talk while encouraging feelings of love, self-acceptance, & forgiveness. Put some in your bath, dot it on your pulse points, take some deep inhalations of it, or diffuse it.
To amp up your massage
Sensual massage is one of my favorite ways to transition from your day to sexytime. It gets you out of your head and into your body, and feels amazing. Add a few drops of Mind Alive to your favorite massage lotion or oil to promote feelings of confidence, relaxation, and connection.
To alleviate health symptoms
Most of what impacts your sex life has nothing to do with sex! If there’s a symptom like pain, tummy issues, or congestion messing with your sexy time, use oils to address them in the moment.
Read more: The Science-Backed Key to Better Sex
As someone with two chronic illnesses—Crohn’s Diseases & a form of arthritis called Ankylosing Spondylitis —pain + tummy troubles are common. I carry Tummy Rub and Pain Ease with me everywhere. The former I rub on my belly when I’m bloated, nauseous, or gassy; the latter I rub on the entire area that’s in pain.
To lift the mood
Sex is on your schedule (or you’re horny) but you kinda sorta aren’t feeling very loving towards your beau. Give Joyful Moments a try to balance the charged emotions & move forward (hopefully towards sexy time).
To wake the eff up
Need a burst of energy? Diffuse or apply Red Mandarin for a burst of energy + overall wellbeing. It’s also great to diffuse when you’re getting ready for a date.
Bonus: try an arousal oil
Unlike regular essential oils, arousal oils are formulated to be applied to the genitals. You apply 1-3 drops to the clitoris and VOILA: instant-arousal.
This one is our fave because it uses peppermint and sweet almond oils. Plus it comes in three different levels, so if you’re more or less sensitive you can adjust accordingly!
With the right essential oils, you can create a more intimate, exciting, & fulfilling sex life.
Like sex toys, oils aren’t a cure-all. They’re one tool of many! But they’re easy to use, lack the taboo associated with vibrators & other adult toys, and have endless uses in the bedroom and out.
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