^That’s^ the title of the workshop I had the honor of leading not once but twice in the past week. Having struggled with this whole “self love” thing most of my life, its a topic that’s near and dear to my heart. Given the amazing conversations had, I think its about time we start talking about it more often in general. How about you?
My goal for the workshop isn’t for you to leave feeling totally in love with yourself. If that happens, great! But remember:
first things first, I’m a realist. If you walk out that door feeling even a smidgeon more confident, sexy, self-assured, etc, I view our time together as a success. Self-love takes work – its totally worth it but it isn’t something that magically happens in an hour or two. Often, its something you have to reaffirm day-in and day out.
As my friend Lindsay always says, “Progress not perfection.”
To frame the time we spend together, we come up with a definition for “self-love.” Its more word association than working definition but the goal is to get us all thinking on the same page and to broaden our idea about what this whole self-love thing looks like. See?
I absolutely love the mix of words and how we moved from more negative associations to more positive ones. A few folks even through in their self-love activities – like masturbation – as the definition. I have to admit – it always warms my heart when someone else brings that form of lovin’ into the conversation before I do!
Ultimately, this week’s workshops reminded me that self-love really has no one meaning. The whole concept is extraordinarily multifaceted and how it shows up in your life may look different even day-to-day. You may have stellar body image but struggle to take time for self-care. Maybe you masturbate regularly but don’t feel super confident in the bedroom. Or perhaps you accept yourself 100% but don’t always appreciate the light, joy, and sexiness you share with others, just by being you.
At the end of the day, self-love is about starting where you are and taking it from there. The best part is that at any point you can move closer to self-love just by making the decision to and starting with one simple step. My favorite strategy is to set a phone alarm with a reminder to breathe. You can take 30 seconds or five minutes, one breath or 100, or do something else entirely. Just be sure you take a moment to nourish, appreciate, and love you.
In the comments below, tell me what self-love means to you and how you practice it.