Chelsea* asks: I don’t understand – why use a butt plug?
This is one of the more common questions about anal that I hear, even from experienced sex toy users and anal sex enthusiasts!
11 Reasons People Use Butt Plugs – Why Use a Butt Plug
- To explore and/or prep for anal intercourse.
- To massage the prostate aka the “male g-spot”. The prostate is incredibly sensitive, and orgasms from it’s stimulation often feel more intense. Butt plugs with a curve are designed to hit the spot, regardless of if you wear it on it’s own or during masturbation or partnered sex.
- To feel full, something that for many people is extremely arousing! Additionally, for people with vulvas, wearing a plug during vaginal intercourse narrows their vaginal canal and steers the penis/dildo/fingers right toward their g-spot!
- To experience multiple orgasms without an erection. That’s right: people with penises can experience multiple orgasms. The secret to doing so is prostate stimulation.
- To act out a double penetration fantasy with only one partner.
- They feel good! Your butt is full of nerve endings that make it sensitive. In fact, the same nerve (the pudendal nerve) that’s responsible for you feeling anything in your clitoris, labia, penis, & perineum, is also responsible for the pleasure you can feel in your anus. Butt plugs are designed to sit in this area comfortably & stimulate right where you want & need it.
- To make your orgasm stronger. As your pelvic floor muscles contract during orgasm, the anal muscles squeeze around the plug, making your spasms feel stronger & more intense.
- To leave your hands free for other sexy things. Because butt plugs stay anchored in place, you get the anal stimulation you desire while using your hands for other fun things.
- To have a similar pleasure experience. The butt is the only thing that people of all genders have. Mentally, you may be intrigued knowing that your beau is experiencing something similar to you (or vice versa).
- It doubles your pleasure. People with vulvas often need a second point of stimulation to experience orgasm. Even if that doesn’t apply to you, more pleasure = more fun.
- To sample the naughtiness of anal play. For many folks, backdoor exploration still feels taboo. Acting on this taboo can heighten your arousal & infuse your sexy time with even more, well, sexy. Butt plugs are a great beginner way to explore this.
Read more: Do This for Your Best Orgasm
What to Look for in a Butt Plug
The most important feature of butt toys is a flared base (flange). Unlike the vagina, toys can get lost up there (in the vagina, the cervix prevents this). This leads to painful & embarrassing trips to the ER so let’s avoid that shall we?
Beyond that, here are 3 features to think about when choosing a butt plug:
- Size. If you haven’t explored anal penetration before, start with you or your beau’s fingers. Once that feels comfortable & pleasurable, look for a butt plug that’s either the same size or only slightly bigger. Work your way up from there! The same rule applies if you have more experience with anal penetration: stick to a plug that’s similar to what you’re used to and slowly increase the size as you want.
- Shape. As with all sex toys, there’s no one answer to this question. Here are some suggestions:
- If you have a prostate – or are using it on a partner who does – look for a plug that’s curved to provide prostate stimulation.
- If you plan on leaving the plug in for some time, look for one with a longer neck.
- Have a vulva and want to wear the plug during vaginal intercourse? Go for something straight.
- Looking for something new & different? Try a butt plug with a series of grooves, almost like anal beads.
- Material. It’s vital that your sex toys – butt plugs or otherwise – are made of body safe materials like silicone, stainless steel, hard plastic, glass, or wood. If you’re new to butt plugs, a softer material like silicone will likely be more comfortable.
One last sexpert tip: if you’re just starting to explore anal play or are generally squicked out about the poo factor, stick to dark colored toys. This way you won’t be able to see any *ahem* residue that may sneak by.
Best Butt Plugs
Now that you have the answer to “why use a butt plug,” here are some to try!
Remember – there’s no single “best” toy. This list includes variety so that you can find what works for you! It’s a mix of personal favorites and plugs well-liked by my clients and colleagues. Everything on this list is made from body safe materials, and is high quality aka won’t die after a handful of uses. Gotta get the most bang for your buck (pun intended)!
Oh – and I made all the links clickable so you can buy them easily if you desire!
Feel free to leave any questions you have about them in the comments and I’ll respond!
Great for…first time butt plug users.
The Bootie is my #1 recommendation if you want to try a butt plug for the first time. It’s small, made of soft silicone, and has a long & flexible neck. All of this makes it easy to insert and incredibly comfortable, even if you want to wear it for a while. Plus, it has a curve for the prostate if that’s how it’ll be used.
Bonus: if you like the look of this one, there’s also a set of 3 in different sizes to grow as your anal adventures do.
Great if…you’re new to butt plugs but want something that vibrates.
The Novice Plug is about the size of a finger, aka the perfect size as you move from hands to toys! It also has over 20 vibration options, which gives you lots of options to play & explore with!
Great…all around, and especially if you want a plug you can wear all day.
A favorite of sex educators & bloggers. You can choose from 3 different sizes, making it perfect no matter what your experience with anal penetration. These are curved to give prostate stimulation. And the stainless steel has a lot of perks: the weight helps relax your anal muscles and make you feel more full. Plus you can explore with some temperature play. Lastly, that handle make inserting & removing oh-so-easy.
Great for… direct + intense prostate stimulation
The Helix is the go-to for folks with prostates – I can’t think of a colleague with a penis who doesn’t adore it! It’s size & shape make it great for beginners, and it’s revered by experienced butt play folks as well.
Sexpert tip: when inserted, squeeze and relax your PC muscles for hands-free and delicious prostate stimulation.
Great if…you have experience with anal toys and want something totally different.
This plug made waves last year because it simulates rimming! The neck has rotating beadsKeep in mind that it’s quite large – both long and girthy – so not recommended for beginners.
Great if…you want to be all natural and/or want to experiment with temperature play
Stone wait what? Yes stone – black granite to be exact. The weight & hardness of it intensifies your experience of orgasm. You can warm it up or cool it down to play with different sensations. Plus, black granite is incredibly grounding & balancing.
Great if…you want the best of both worlds, one toy to grow as your anal adventures do.
Know you want to go all the way with anal play? The Perfect Plug Kit is, well, perfect. It includes a thin beginner plug + a vibrating intermediate plug with removable 3-speed vibrator. Both are made of silicone, won’t move around once inserted, and have some texture for added sensation
Why use a butt plug?!
Because they’re pretty fricking awesome and, as always there’s something out there for everyone, no matter your preferences & desires.
Have a sex Question for me? here’s 5 ways to get Your answer:
- Pop it in the comments, submit it here or email me at passionbykait[at]gmail[dot]com – I’ll either send you an article that answers your question or answer it in an upcoming blog post.
- Attend one of my upcoming workshops. Click here to see the schedule.
- Host a private workshop for you & your friends.
- Book a free Spark Call. Click here to get on my schedule.
- Sign up for 1:1 sex counseling. Learn more.
*Name changed for anonymity’s sake.
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